Here is the obligatory end-of-the-year quiz I do every year…

1. What did you do in 2015 that you’d never done before? Visited Costa Rica, run a half-marathon, had a miscarriage
2. Did you keep your New Year’s resolutions, and will you make more for next year? I actually did a lot of my resolutions and will be working on more intentions for 2016.
3. Did anyone close to you give birth? Yes – I got a new nephew in July.
4. Did anyone close to you die? We lost a baby in utero this year. Also, my third cousin passed away.
5. What countries did you visit? Costa Rica and Nicaragua
6. What would you like to have in 2016 that you lacked in 2015? A healthy pregnancy and baby
7. What date(s) from 2015 will remain etched upon your memory, and why? I don’t have exact dates for all of these, but these were important events this year:

  • Winter Wellness Weekend in January
  • Our Disney trip in April
  • The 10-mile River Run in May
  • The New Harmony Trail Half-Marathon in May
  • Our Costa Rica trip in July
  • Weekend spent in St. Louis in September
  • Starting the travel program in September
  • Our positive pregnancy test – September 6
  • The ultrasound that showed we would miscarry – October 5
  • The miscarriage – October 8/9
  • Weekend in Bloomington for our 9-year anniversary in October
  • The week we spent in Crossville, TN at the end of the year

8. What was your biggest achievement of the year? Running a half-marathon – I never thought I would do that!
9. What was your biggest failure? I don’t think of this as a failure because there is nothing I could have done to save her, but my biggest disappointment this year was losing our baby.
10. Did you suffer illness or injury? Yes. I definitely count a miscarriage as an “illness or injury.”
11. What was the best thing you bought? Our plane tickets to Costa Rica

12. Whose behavior merited celebration? The few close friends who have been supportive during and after our miscarriage, Fr. Bernie who has helped us get a lot of things sorted out, and my OB who has personally called me himself 3 times to go over information I needed.

13. Whose behavior made you appalled and depressed? People who didn’t or couldn’t acknowledge our baby as a real person. I know miscarriage is an awkward situation, but it certainly lets you know the people you can really count on.
14. Where did most of your money go? Costa Rica and having to take our dog to the emergency vet for eating an entire bar of chocolate that was 90% cacao
15. What did you get really, really, really excited about? Our Costa Rican vacation, having another baby
16. What song(s) will always remind you of 2015? Gone Too Soon by Daughtry, Beam Me Up by Pink, Tears in Heaven by Eric Clapton
17. Compared to this time last year, are you:
i. happier or sadder? Sadder
ii. thinner or fatter? The same
iii. richer or poorer? The same
18. What do you wish you’d done more of? Being present in the moment
19. What do you wish you’d done less of? Worrying
20. How did you spend Christmas? We spent Christmas Eve with my family and my mom’s family. We spent Christmas Day as a family and then with my husband’s family later that evening.
21. Did you fall in love in 2015? I fell in love with a baby I never got to meet.
23. What was your favorite TV program? The Walking Dead, Modern Family
24. Do you hate anyone now that you didn’t hate this time last year? No 
25. What was the best book you read? There were so many, but some of my favorites were A Small Indiscretion by Jan Ellison, The Poisonwood Bible by Barbara Kingsolver, and This Is Where I Leave You by Jonathan Hopper
26. What was your greatest musical discovery? Ed Sheeran
27. What did you want and get? A trip to Costa Rica
28. What did you want and not get? A healthy pregnancy, a new vehicle
29. What was your favorite film of this year? I saw very few movies, but the new Vacation movie really made me laugh
30. What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you? I turned 34. The kids made breakfast for me and made me stay in bed so they could bring it to me. They gave me lots of gifts and cuddles. Anya had a performance at Barnes and Nobles and then we had lunch at Firehouse. We spent the afternoon at a Christmas market in town, went to mass, and then had dinner at a Greek restaurant. We had planned to take a carriage ride to see Christmas lights, but the rides were all sold out by the time we got there.
31.How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2015? Comfortable
32What kept you sane? My Starbucks nights, Book club, Journal circle
33.Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most? I really didn’t have time to mess with anything like that.
34. What political issue stirred you the most? Birth rights, intactivism
35. Who did you miss? The baby I won’t get to meet.
36Who was the best new person you met? The ladies in the Journal circle I’m in and the new members of the Book club.

37Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2015: For me, life begins at conception, and losing a baby in utero feels just as real as losing someone you knew on the “outside.”


One comment

  1. I’m so sorry for your loss Rachel! I’ll be praying that your desires for another little one are met this coming year.

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